{A Small Metal Box}

Monday, March 01, 2010

We always give a small metal box with this story inside to friends who are getting married. Tim likes to include $50 and a note saying, "the first 50 are on us." We've loved making this tradition a part of our marriage and hope you do to. It's never too late to start!


Dear Ann Landers,

Last weekend, we celebrated my parents’ 50th wedding anniversary. This morning they left on a long-awaited trip to Hawaii. They were as excited as if it were their honeymoon! When my parents married, they had only enough money for a three-day trip 50 miles from home. They made a pact then that each time they made love, they would put a dollar in a special metal box and save it for a honeymoon in Hawaii for their 50th anniversary. Dad was a policeman, and Mom was a schoolteacher. They lived in a modest house and did all their own repairs. Raising five children was a challenge, and sometimes, money was short. But no matter what emergency came up , Dad would not let mom take any money out of the “Hawaii account.” As the amount grew, they put it in a savings account and then bought CDs.

My parents were always very much in love. I can remember Dad coming home and telling Mom, “I have a dollar in my pocket.” She would smile at him and reply, “I know just how to spend it.” When each of us children married, Mom and Dad gave us a small metal box and told us their secret, which we found enchanting. All five of us are now saving for our dream honeymoons. Mom and Dad never told us how much money they managed to save, but it must have been considerable because when they cashed in those CDs, they had enough for airfare to Hawaii, plus hotel accommodations for 10 days and plenty of spending money. Before they boarded the plane, Dad winked and said, “Tonight we are starting an account for Cancun. That should only take 25 years!”

Ann, I thought you’d enjoy this story about 50 great years of intimacy in marriage!

From a loving daughter in Abilene, Texas

38 comments:

Chrys said...

That's awesome! Thanks for sharing the idea.

You know, hubby and I are both from Abilene, TX...wondering if we know these folks. :)

Chrys

Tim & Em Loerke said...

chrys, i didn't know that, but it makes me smile knowing that you read this woman's great story. we have truly loved making this a loerke tradition!

zarah said...

oh, wow. i'm in tears :)
this is sooo beautiful!

Emma Ann said...

we have started our own box too, and the travel journal, and the questions! thank you so much for the great relationship builder ideas!

Today's Letters said...

emma ann, yea! we're so glad you've been able to find some of our suggestions helpful. the most difficult to maintain will be the weekly questions. however, they will be the most rewarding. fight for that 20 min each week! much love, em

kelsey said...

This is such a neat idea!

Sara said...

Totally teared up when I read this... I think my fiancee and I will have to do this for sure.

Thanks for sharing!!

Anonymous said...

I think this idea is so sweet and personal. I've been married for almost 6 years. I love my husband dearly and I'd love to start this "metal box" thing, but how do I get my not-very-sentimental-or-mushy hubby to go along with it? Any suggestions how to introduce it? Ps I'm a shy person myself, so it needs to be tasteful ;)

Today's Letters said...

anony, we have met people in their 60's who just started their metal box. it's never to late to start! since valentine's day is just around the corner maybe you could give him a copy of the story with a metal box? i have yet to meet a dude who wasn't excited about this idea when his wife initiated it. tim and i often leave dollar bills around the house for each other just as a subtle way to communicate intimacy. hope this helps! em

Janene said...

I LOVE this idea! Way to keep the spark alive!

Rima said...

This is super brilliant! I will definitely talk to my other half about this! YAY!

The Harline Family said...

I love this idea! I have been looking everywhere for a cute metal box. Where do you get yours. I am not in the same state but any ideas would be ever so helpful!!!

kacey.harline@gmail.com

Today's Letters said...

we found our box at a flea market ... they typically have tons of old metal boxes! or you can also check ebay.

alicia said...

Found your blog through joc (your friend@taylor, mine from her home town) love that gal. so. much. Anyway, I can't stop reading! Hubs &i have been married for six years & we're at a VERY strange place (career-wise) These questions, box & journal ideas invite the 'fun' into THIS season of life. thank you for inspiring us to keep things playful, even during tough stuff. And, for letting people in to your life, I know it's gotta be hard sometimes. here's to playing and throwing frisbees again! Thanks!

Today's Letters said...

alicia, glad you found us! joc is a good egg. yes, hopefully lots of frisbee throwing and fort building in store for the both of us! xoxo

Toni Shawver said...

I'm in tears over this! Stumbled across your blog on Pinterest today and I've already shared it with a friend that just got married and have decided to add several of your traditions to my own marriage! I'm from a small town just an hour from Abilene, TX! I go shopping there all the time! :) So cool :)

Anonymous said...

This is sooooo precious - I just love the idea!! I'm getting married early next Spring and will definitely look for a box before then so we can start that on our honeymoon!

Vanessa said...

I stumbled across your blog on pinterest today. I am getting married in 18 days, it has snuck up on me LOL I want to say thank you for posting this. I also read the 10 things that made your marriage, and am very inspired by this. My fiance' and I have been friends for the past 9 years, so sometimes I think we forget to play together and to make things new and exciting. I really want to start this, and the traveling journal idea. When you guys started this did you talk about it first or did you just start it and hide it for the other to find?
Thanks so much for posting the things you do and being so encouraging. ~Vanessa

Today's Letters said...

vanessa, so glad you found our blog! tim actually gifted me our journal on our 1 yr anniversary. he wrote the first entry explaining how he wanted us to use it as an opportunity to encourage one another, as well as hide it for the other person to find. i loved the idea! now we're on our 2nd journal. xoxo

Cheryl Wilson - O'Pry said...

Thanks for sharing this!!

I'm getting married soon and this will make the perfect gift for my groom. :-)

Kelly L. said...

I love this idea! Thank you for sharing. I can't wait to start this with my hubby.

Vics.UK. said...

Lovely to read these ideas. My husband and I are not so good right now, and maybe just maybe some of this stuff could help. Thank you for sharing....xx

Madi @ Real Passions said...

Thank you so much for this! Found your blog through a friend on Pinterest and love your ideas. I've already shared the "Small Metal Box" and "10 Things That Have Made All the Difference" ones with my fiance' and he loved both of them (we're getting married in May). Since we are some of the first of our friends to be getting married, I'm sure we will be giving a lot of small metal boxes. Please thank your parents for starting this tradition and sharing it with you! And thank you for sharing it with all of us!

JessicaC said...

So glad I came across your blog! We are getting married in June, and always looking for ways to improve our relationship. Can't wait to start looking for our "small metal box!"

Jessica Tibbitts said...

I LOVE this! I am getting married in 36 days (not that I'm counting) and just bought a small metal box to give to my fiance as a wedding present.

If anyone is wondering where to look for a perfectly vintage box, etsy is a great place to look. All shapes, sizes, and prices.

Thank you so much for sharing!

Jailhousenurse said...

WE JUST STARTED THIS JUNE 3, 2012. WE PUT IN $10 every time we make love, we use a 1 litre soda bottle.To hard to take the money out to "borrow". We have over $650 so far and this is Jan 2013. We are using it as our mad money on our 30th anniversary trip this summer....We will use it on the actual day all long to pay for breakfast, lunch snacks and dinner...

OwensAve said...

just bought our box!!! Got it off ebay. giving this as a gift to the b/f on VDAY....think its ok to do it as a couple not yet married???

Today's Letters said...

owensave, we would encourage you to wait until marriage. love your idea to make this a vday gift!

Melissa Morgan-Oakes said...

I wish I had known about this sooner. After 22 amazing years we owe the box a good chunk of change! But I am passing the idea on to my newlywed daughter and her husband for sure - thank you so much for sharing.

Get Busy Living said...

Thank you for sharing this story and idea. Brought tears to my eyes at how simple and heartfelt of an idea this is. My hubby and I have been married for 5 years and have a rambunctious 2 year old. Needless to say, we never take time out for just the two of us. Last night I told my husband about this and is on board! I'm also going to be sharing all about this on my blog! :)

Anonymous said...

Looks like I'm the only realist here....
I've been married almost 2 years. Based on our frequency, the micro-interest rate invironment we are living in, and inflation, there is NO way that putting a dollar in a box every time we had sex would add up to enough for a nice vacation in 48 years. Seriously people....

Anonymous said...

What a load of rubbish. My man and I have been together for 32 years and have had numerous 2nd honeymoons both cheap and expensive. He will be nearly 85 by the time we have been together 50 years assuming we both live that long - hardly the stuff of dream honeymoons! Live for today I say, never mind saving in a metal box!

Today's Letters said...

anony 1, i guess it depends on what you mean by nice? everyone's definition is different.

anony 2, i don't think i read anywhere in the letter that this is the ONLY vacation married people can take? it's just a fun way to save for a larger trip down the road.

anony 1&2, your negative perspectives will hinder you from experiencing two of life's greatest gifts: joy & play. i hope you can start to see things in a more optimistic bent soon.

Anonymous said...

yikes those last two posters were really negative! I love these ideas. My fiance and I probably won't do all of them and will probably do things a little different, but these are all fun ideas that we can work off of to make our own. Thanks for sharing!

Where do you find your tin boxes?

Today's Letters said...

anony, we find most of ours at flea markets!

Robyn said...

I love this story- am crying rereading it

suzahome said...

That's so romantic!

Venassa said...

Such a sweet idea!

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